Gossip Girl just went Dair.
After Georgina and Chuck schemed against Dan at CeCe’s wake, she became bankrupt. Then, Georgina offered her a hand as long as she “owed her one.” Ivy Dickens inherited all of the Rhodes money and property. Lola and Nate had sex. Serena was sad. And Dan and Blair kissed in a scene that made me dizzy.
1. Dair is on, basically. Your thoughts?
Heather | I don’t think I need to answer this. I think my squeals were heard loud and clear, across the globe.
Samantha | Blah. Dair is such an awkward turtle to me. I’m just happy that we now know that while that all happens Chuck is going to be hanging with Jack! Praise the Gossip Girl gods for his return! And finally a good storyline for Chuck that doesn’t involve him sipping scotch and pining over a depressed princess.
Heba | I have been waiting for this moment forever, and now it’s actually here I cannot believe it. It’s just too good to be true. Last year, in 4.17, they had this first kiss, and now this, them. I’m starting to think 17 is my lucky number.
Michael | Samantha brings up a good point. It seems that finally Chuck will actually get a storyline as will others. It seemed like that Serena scene hinted at a new storyline to come… and Ivy was creating a new story for the van der Woodsens. As for Dan and Blair, after a year and 13 episodes of nothing, it’s about time, basically.
2. Okay, try to take shipper emotions out of the situation. Dan basically told Blair he’s been trying to scheme her away from Chuck and she was okay with it?
Heather | I can’t decide on what to think of that scene. One moment, he is telling Chuck that’s not the truth, and in the next breath he is telling Blair it is the truth. There is also things being left out that he did with no intention of her ever choosing him. It really was a poorly done scene. I feel like they were trying to avoid a redux of the Louis situation — Blair choosing someone basically only because he’s sparkly and perfect compared to the darkness of Chuck. I have no problem with Dan having flaws. In my opinion, his flaws are part of what make him a dynamic and interesting character. Perfection is boring (see Louis pre-5.13). My problem comes in with how rushed this was. They spent half the season showing him as being nearly perfect, and then do the reverse. Evolving characterization is not a bad thing, but that’s what I want to see, slow character build-up, not giant plot-driven OMG moments.
Samantha | I just wish people would realize that all of these characters are flawed and quit putting Humphrey on a pedestal. He isn’t perfect. None of them are. That is what makes the show interesting. I think Dan and Blair could also benefit from realizing this information, even though they both do think he is indeed flawless.
Heba | I love Dair with all my heart, but Gossip Girl is basically ruining every character in its incoherency. The characters, all of them, transform to different people in every episode. Blair would have never forgiven Chuck for scheming her, and she’s in love with Dan because he’s different. Or that’s what I used to think. And with this, they somehow anti-Blaired Blair.
Michael | I don’t understand this for plenty of reasons. For one, Dan tried to get Chuck and Blair together (even though it was stupid to not have it be at his apartment, but whatever). And now Gossip Girl is making it so that he actually did all of this? At least Blair got a bit more mad when she thought he sent the picture of them kissing, but I don’t understand why she would just go to his loft after he confessed that he was trying to take Chuck and Louis out of the picture? Why not a little bit more from this scene? Something! ANYTHING! Why would she be all “Chuck, I’m not IN love with you” (aw, crap, I forgot to make that a question!) right after she realized this!? SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN THIS TO ME!!!!
3. CeCe’s Final Will and Testament
Heather | Did anyone not see this coming? Really?
Samantha | Cece is a BAMF, even from beyond the grave. That is all.
Heba | I was never Ivy’s fan, to be honest. But when she told Lily and Rufus to leave HER apartment, I was cheering her on! I hated the Rhodes family SO much in this episode, and I agree with Lola: the only person I feel sorry for is Ivy. CeCe knew everything there is to know about Ivy, so they should just stfu. She was better with CeCe than anyone else, so she deserved all what CeCe gave her.
Michael | Okay, Heba: Ivy is flawless and amazing and flawless. So. And the Rhodes family is so heartless. Ivy was all like “I loved her” and Lily was all “You probably poisoned her!” WHAT? And Carol was bitching about not getting her payday. This woman is ridiculous. What’s a bit awful is that obviously Serena loves her grandmother a lot but they tried to write this scene as if Ivy was the only one who cared enough to actually just love her and be there for her. I don’t know. I feel like Serena could have taken Ivy’s place. Maybe she was just too preoccupied with pining for a guy who doesn’t love her. And oh, goodness, another question I forgot: Lola being Serena’s half sister!
4. Ivy Dickens is richer than a mofo
Heather | Once again, was this supposed to be a shocking twist? I did enjoy evil Ivy. I know I am probably supposed to be rooting against her right now, but it’s fun. I really want to know where this story goes. Does Ivy team up with Lola and take down Serena (haven’t had one of those in while)? Does she, through a series of convoluted events, become the real Gossip Girl? Does she try to get someone, anyone, to call her Serena? So many questions that need to be answered.
Samantha | Ivy is taking over the throne after Cece’s passing. I approve.
Heba | THIS is gonna change the dynamic of the show, and I cannot wait to see how it’s gonna play out. The UES has a new BAMF and her name is Ivy Dickens.
Michael | Once again, Heba… she was always a BAMF!!! Ha! Okay, but seriously. I love Ivy because she’s somewhat badass and also somewhat redeemable, but I don’t know what’s happening here. Why would she basically throw them out? She loves them. She said they’re the closest she has to a family. She had to know that them finding out who she is would not go well. So take the money and buy another apartment. (Also, called it! Along with the Lola thing. Because it was so blatantly obvious.)
5. Georgina schemed everyone AND Blair and Chuck are in debt to her!
Heather | I don’t feel like I can even comment on this. I am still kind of confused about her role in the episode, and I definitely don’t know where her story line is heading. This was just one of the many things of the episode that felt completely shoe-horned in to do nothing more than set up the story line for the finale.
Samantha | It took a while, but real Georgina has finally returned. I’m glad, but sad that it means she must once again leave us. Figures. We all know how much the writers struggle to write awesome characters.
Heba | Oh, God. I’m sick of Georgina. I just want her to leave already. I don’t get why she’s still here. She’s scheming everyone and everyone believes her and it’s all so BLAH. Thank God she’s not Gossip Girl anymore. I want the real one back.
Michael | I’m most intrigued by this, to be honest. I want to know how this will play out once Georgina returns. Also, she is the worst blogger. She really sucks. Maybe second to Phillip.
6. Other thoughts
Heather | What is up with Nate this season? He’s not even fun anymore. He used to at least go around getting high and playing Just Dance, but now it’s all stuffy suits and “play nice” comments. Philip, the nothing of a character who is the sidekick to a walking plot device in pretty clothes, has more of a personality than Nate does this season. I am glad he’s “growing up” or whatever, but does he have to be so boring while doing it?
Samantha | JackBassJackBassJackBassJackBa
Heba | So Lola and Serena are half sisters? Someone (MICHAEL!) called it before the episode, so I was waiting for it all night and was kinda looking forward to it. I fear the show will ruin this storyline like it does every single one, but I won’t prejudge. Let’s just wait and see.
Michael | Yes, me and about 10 million other people called it but I’ll take it! So, let’s see… all the questions I forgot: CeCe’s wake was ridiculous to be taking place during all this scheming. There also needed to be more explanation from Blair professing her love to Chuck to being all “I’m not in love with you.” Really glad that Diana and Jack’s story will be going somewhere… or so, I’m guessing. I don’t think I’m missing anything…
7. What grade would you give this episode?
Heather | Shipper Grade: A The final scene is now one of my favorite scenes on the series, and though, like I said earlier, I don’t like how they went about doing it, I like that they had her choose him for him, scuffs and all. It would have been really disappointing had she just wanted him because he was the nice one, the safe one. Her wanting him, even after being shown that he is still human and makes mistakes, on top of all the other “obstacles,” is far more satisfying. I love Blair, but I also love Dan, and I think both of them deserve to be loved for who they are, and I would not been happy to see her “settle” for him. It wouldn’t have been fair, to either of them.
Non-Shipper Grade: C- Honestly, I have no idea what was going on in most of the episode. The only thing that would have been surprising about the episode was revealed in the Canadian promo, so every time there was a big reveal, I rolled my eyes, and then congratulated myself on the hollow victory of guessing the overly-obvious plot twists on a CW teen drama. Carol is annoying beyond belief. I am ready for her to be gone. I think Ivy and Lola’s stories have a lot of potential, and I am really looking forward to seeing where that leads. Serena’s upcoming story seems like it could be a lot of fun too. With great power (secrets), comes great responsibility (power). Are we going to see the return of Dark!Serena? So overall, a lot of potential in upcoming episodes, and while this one was fun enough, it felt rushed and very transitional.
Samantha | Eh, B-. It wasn’t great, wasn’t awful. Basically, like this whole season, it was just eh, whatever. Also, when I saw that the show wouldn’t return until April 2nd, for the first time ever I said “GOOD a break from Gossip Girl!” Seriously, that is what this show has become.
Heba | A C? I didn’t enjoy the episode much except for a few moments, especially the last ones with Ivy and the Humphreys &, of course, the Dair scene at the end. B
Michael | An “A” for moving plots. A “B” for allowing Georgina to actually be good at stuff. A “C” for not explaining anything in the triangle well enough. A “D” for basically saying that everyone was out of character ever since the car crash and for still making Lola boring even if she’s Serena’s half sister. And an “F” for having this take place at CeCe’s fucking wake. I mean, really. So I think that averages out to a solid C.