American Idol recap: Slow musical arrangements, fast eliminations

The second week of “Sudden Death” proved to be just about as crazy as the first. Melinda Ademi started it off for the girls with Jessie J’s, “Nobody’s Perfect.” Now I’m a total Mel-enthusiast, so to speak, but the performance never really took off. She chose to play it safely so all-in-all was a little blah. Candice Glover, another voice I loved from the beginning, came out with “Natural Woman.” Those runs were EVERYTHING. I expect nothing less. As this is her second chance at this competition, I guess it’s only about kicking a– and taking names. *Gives props.* Side bar: Mariah was serving good hair volume and boob-age and Nicki came back with the black roots and platinum wig. It was a lot more tolerable not parted down the middle.

Next up was Juliana Chahayed with Demi Lovato’s, “Skyscraper.” She has a very airy, young-like voice. Her rendition was soft and pretty but not necessarily good enough. I did, however, enjoy watching her play that guitar that was nearly quadruple her size (Exaggeration). Another contestant that played an instrument was Jett Hermano, to the decelerated tune of Rihanna’s, “Only Girl.” It wasn’t bad at all and she had this “breathy-falsetto” that aided in her delivery. I wasn’t mad at it. The fifth young lady of the night was Cristabel Clack, who applied her raspy-like vocal texture to Alicia Key’s, “No One.” She over-sung parts of the song, especially at the end, but it wasn’t awful. It wasn’t incredibly memorable, either.

The trend of the night was to slow things down, and that is exactly what Aubrey Cleland did with Beyoncé’s, “Sweet Dream.” It was pretty and artfully controlled but the properness of it all ignited my wants for her to be a tad more edgy or spontaneous. But that’s just me, because the judges loved her… and her good looks. After Aubrey, Rachel Hale woke things up with a very fun, “’Nothing but The Water.” I liked her tone and the fact that she chose to go against the grain. She most certainly won both the audience and me over. Breanna Steer made-a-go at Jazmine Sullivan’s, “Bust Your Windows.” Her high-waist pants were popping and her performance was fairly decent. I just found it annoying that she chose to hold notes full-out instead of adding some sort of vibrato.

The last two ladies of the night were Janelle Arthur and Zoanette Johnson. Janelle sang Lady Antebellum’s, “Just a Kiss” which was definitely the wrong song choice. Some parts seemed rushed but at least it ended well. She was definitely NOT a stand-out. Zoanette was well….Zoanette. With the “Circle of Life” she gave big hair, wild facial expressions and full theatrics. I was both disturbed and entertained, all at the same time. It is clear that there is a voice somewhere deep down in there but she cannot keep getting by on sheer bizarreness. America isn’t going take that, or maybe I’m just speaking for myself.

In the end, Zoanette, Aubrey, Candice, Rachel and Janelle survived eliminations. If I had it my way Rachel would’ve replaced her country counterpart, Janelle and Cristabel would’ve taken Zoanette’s spot. But the cookie crumbled, how it crumbled…now on to Thursday’s shenanigans.

The boys’ night started off with Matheny. Although the band was really loud, from what I can tell, his voice was good but there was a lot of over-singing. Side Bar: Mariah’s necklace had “My cleavage is down here” written all over it. Gupreet gave a mediocre rendition of James Morrison’s, “Nothing ever hurt like you.” Nicki’s words were, “Hell NAW” and Randy followed with, “that was horrible.” So it would be safe to say that the best part of that performance was the yellow turban.

The next and best act of the night was Vincent with Lenny Williams’, “Cause I love you.” He quite possible tore that song to pieces, in the best possible way. What was distracting though, was Zoanette having a mini-orgasm on the sidelines. Like girl either calm down, or throw your panties on the stage already! Then came the incredibly cool, Nick Boddington with James Morrison’s, “Say something Now.” He played it real smooth and at points it was a little disconnected but his voice is just so good that I overlooked A LOT.

The following two gentlemen were severely blah. Josh Holiday chose to deliver an original song. He started out at the piano and then got up in order to have some kind of big moment. It was pitchy and just…not…good enough. David Oliver Williams came out with his guitar and performed “Fever.” I wasn’t really moved by his voice but I did happen to like the accompaniment of the organ. If it weren’t for that, I would’ve been rolling my eyes the entire time instead of just at certain points. When Bryant Tadeo took the stage, things changed… at least for me because the judges weren’t feeling him. He gave a laidback version of, “New York State of Mind.” By the end I was positive that I wanted to have his little Hawaiian babies.

One of my early favorites, Burnell Taylor came out sporting a new look. He lost forty pounds and changed up his style. Side bar: I kind of thought he was cute whilst chunky and scruffy. He tactfully sang John Legend’s, “This time” which only further underlined my prior statement that their voices are similar. Lazaro Arbos took on Keith Urban’s, “Tonight I wanna Cry.” The whole way through I kept asking “Is this in English?” All-in-all it was safe, nothing worth bragging about in my opinion. The last act of the night was Cortez Shaw with “Titanium.” He removed the techno and slowed it down. Dude can really hold a note but again, I wasn’t entirely feeling it.

In the end, Vincent, Lazaro, Cortez, Burnell, and Nick make it. Side bar: Mariah was giving good legs and strappy heels. Worrrkkkkkkkkkk, honey. Also, Keith is such a gentleman. He gets up to hug everyone. If he only he wasn’t married. If I had it my way, Lazaro or Cortez would be replaced by Bryant. The judges made a big mistake by letting him go.

Now that breaking it down is done and over with, I only have a few things more to say. All of Mariah’s “boob” moments: Google/YouTube those bihhs. Zoanette’s ridiculousness: Google/YouTube that bihh. Last but not least, Vincent’s performance: Google/YouTube that bihh. Make it happen…like, now!

Tags: | Categories: Reality Check, Recaps
About the author: Chavon
Chavon
Chavon. College Student / Reality TV Lover. Favorite shows: Catfish, Washington Heights, Nikita, and Person of Interest. Totally team Honey Boo-Boo. Follow me on Twitter!

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