After taking most of season 6 off — which is unfortunate because it has been the best thing on television this season, am I right? — we’re back for a quick roundtable discussion of Gossip Girl’s penultimate episode ever. In this episode, the writers try to kill off Chuck one final time but then don’t because he’s a series regular. Who does die however is Chuck’s pop pop Bart Bass… for the second time… in one of the most dramatic (and hilarious) moments ever. In lesser dramatic but equally hilarious moments, Blair and her bitches gang practically take down a criminal (literally), Dan thinks women will like him after he trashes them publicly, Nate is behind bars because people think he is smart enough to pull off a money scheme, and Serena pretends she’s moving to Los Angeles.
But you know, it was one of the best episodes of season 6. Read our thoughts and then answer the questions in the comments!
Calhoun | I mean… we all knew it had to happen, right? Has that actor ever survived a TV series?
Samantha | Was that even real? I mean, it has to be a dream sequence, right? It was SO campy!!
Michael | Okay, my initial reactions to it was that it was absolutely hilarious. The fall! The reactions shots! The music! The scene as a whole, however, was kind of grim. Robert John Burke was great at being 100% villainous instead of just having creepy face. They should have given him more of that the entire series.
Calhoun | I’m not sure how I’m feeling about this. I feel like they’re one of those things were they’re kinda made by their sexual tension, ya know? Although I will never forget that limo ride in season one, so maybe I’ll take that back. yeah, I’m pretty into it, who are we kidding?
Samantha | FINALLY!! Ugh. Are we really supposed to believe that Chuck Bass has gone three months without sexual relations? This is ridiculous.
Michael | I know, Samantha! It was like the dry spell of season 5. NO ONE DOESN’T HAVE SEX ON GOSSIP GIRL. Why do you think people watch, writers? Nate’s the only one that does it right on this show. Anyway, besides that, I love how Blair completely dismissed Ivy’s “pact” as well like hers and Chuck’s isn’t completely ridiculous either, and I didn’t even realize the parallel two episodes ago.
Calhoun | Serena needs to put Dan in her rearview. Yes, that was absolutely a reference to cracked out Blake Lively in The Town.
Samantha | No. At this point, Dan can not be redeemed. There has been too much damage. He is just the worst. Period. Also, CARTERENA 4EVA!
Michael | I mean, maybe she should put him in the rearview, but Dan also has had “a plan this whole time.” I’m eager to see what that is and what The Final Chapter is all about. It could be enough to salvage their relationship or make him the evilest. I can’t wait. (And also, I’ve just been a fan of the ludicrousness of Dan’s storyline this season. At this point, the show needed to go all the way to the deep end to be entertaining.)
Calhoun | Nothing really comes to mind, but then again, I’m usually half a bottle of cabernet sauvignon in to tolerate Gossip Girl these days…
Samantha | Nate, pleaseeeee fox your lip. It is just distracting at this point.
Michael | I noticed the lip, too! But how have we not talked about Blair’s Bitches? Bahaha! I loved it. And also, why does everyone think that they’re the mayor of New York on Gossip Girl? YOU’RE BANISHED!
Calhoun | Final seasons are usually pretty rough, but after the turmoil (and by “turmoil” I mean “terribleness”) of Season 5, I’m willing to say goodbye.
Samantha | Honestly, I’ve really been liking it. There so many parallels (intentional and not so much) that make me lol all the time. It’s definitely an infinite upgrade from season 5.
Michael | Somewhere a long time ago, Gossip Girl became the most ridiculous thing on television. This season, however, they’ve tried to reel it back in and what they ended up doing was just making it boring for about six episodes. Extremely boring. There was an episode where every scene I literally cried out, “Why?” At least season 5’s ridiculousness was fun to make fun of. That said, the final three or so episodes have been good enough (and ridiculous), so season 6 has been a hit or miss, I guess.
Calhoun | B
Samantha | A+! For the first time in a long time I was actually emotionally invested in an episode
Michael | Unfortunately, we grade GG on a curve, so A-. Hey, it did something instead of being the same episode over and over again. This is the same grade I’d give the microfilm episode, too. I don’t care, I don’t care, I don’t care… I loved that episode! (Keep in mind that most of the episodes would be like in the Cs this season, seriously… and ON THE CURVE.)
Calhoun | Part of me just wants Kristen Bell to show up as Gossip Girl in what is unquestionably the most meta moment of the show’s entire run. I’m not holding out hope…
Samantha | I already said this on tumblr, but I Dan ends up as GG, I am rewatching all the episodes and writing a list of all the times when that would have made NO SENSE!
Michael | Yeah, it seriously looks as though Dan is going to be Gossip Girl, but according to the promos it could actually be that Dan knows who Gossip Girl is and has yet to say it. So there’s that. Maybe that’s what The Final Chapter is all about, an exposé on the person with the most power on the UES. I mean, how do you get power (which Dan wants)? By cutting off the head. Other predictions: Nate leaves Sage for an older lady; Sage falls off a roof. Chuck gets arrested and Blair visits him to have sex because they’re like “aw, F it.” Lily has lines and Rufus smiles at her. Ivy is amazing and does Tarantula by herself. Serena DERPS her way back to New York but ends up alone. Georgina goes clinically insane and roams the streets yelling sexual innuendos at everyone and screaming bloody mary mating calls.
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I agree with Samantha on almost every count. Michael you have your work cut out for you for the photo recap. Please, please have a cap with Bart's creep face when Dan asks "do you really want to know?". At first reaction, i loved the episode but there were some huge plot holes. Like did Chuck get on that plane in the first place? How did he end up back at the party? When did he conspire with Dan? and the score of this episode? So campy. It was like a dramatic talkie with the close up facial shots, phone grab lunges and the final zoom on chuck and blair in the end. ah well, you gotta love it till the end cuz it is the end.
I cannot BELIEVE you gave this episode an A-. Besides being terribly-written, this show headed south so long ago, starting with that ridiculous pact that Blair made with God in season five. Now we're to believe that Chuck is some salvageable man? Are you KIDDING me? Plus, he talks about what being a man should be like? Empty words, Bass. Empty words. I just cannot wait for this crap to be over and done with. I'm honestly amazed that you gave this episode an A-, when all I wanted to do was throttle every single character (minus Dan, because he is my bb 5ever and always). At this point, Chuck and Blair deserve each other with all their stupidity.
Yeah, I'm not sure what the point of Chucks little speech about being a man was since it all kinda gets negated thirty seconds later when he DOES NOT SAVE HIS FATHER FROM FALLING OFF A BUILDING.
LMAO you're taking the grade way too seriously. Everyone knows Gossip Girl is awful; no one is grading it on a scale of being good. I had fun making fun of it and some things kind of made sense. On a GG scale, that's more than succeeding.
Gossip Girl
"We strive to strive"
Do you watch Supernatural? Cos those photorecaps would be absolutely amazing... (random thought....)
Couldn't agree more. I don't understand the Chuck and Blair fascination when they're both complete caricatures. And you're the first person other than myself (seems like it) who actually likes Dan... sure, the writers made him "evil" (in order to divert from Chuck's "dark side"?) this season, but up until now he has been the only voice of reason on this show.
I've stopped caring after the disaster that was the season 5 finale and am quite glad that this torture is over.
Yeah, I find it hard to believe that there are so many Dan haters. I see his points clearly, to be honest. But I may be biased since I pretty much hate all UES-ers, even though Blair used to be my favorite character when the series first started.
Liked the round table, and I can't believe I didn't think of combining alcohol and GG. That's how I get through Glee, and I have a feeling it will be needed during the finale.
I disagree with most of the Dan comments though because Dan. Dan!!!!! I remember when the show first started and I was already a Blair devotee and a Dan hater because of the books, and I was annoyed at every little thing he did even when he was doing something good and helping Blair make friends at college. He was so pretentious and self righteous, and it only made things worse when occasionally he'd say something funny or look cute because I was never going to like him.
And now its pretty much the opposite. Dan is always funny and adorable and cute and often making sense no matter how ridiculous he looks or how he acts. He is so precious and I will miss him. I will even miss this season's Dan because everyone else is going crazy or acting out of character so he should join the fun. Someday, I'm going to go back and watch from the beginning so I can enjoy Dan Humphrey like I was meant to.
@michaelcollado:disqus lmao, I logged in to your site because I expected a dark vader scene cap for this episode. but your round table replies still got me lul-ing on the floor. What would I do without your trolling? omg I can't believe it will be over next week. They're gonna bang finally lmao
The final better be good. The whole Dan-Chuck scene at the party was lame as hell... Are they even going to explain how that went down?
Some Dan Stans need to settle down and have a drink....or seven. We all know this show is crap, but love it anyway. Anyways, I'm puzzeled as to why no one has pointed out that Blair is clearly psychic, her dreams TELL THE FUTURE!!!! Ivy, Sage, Dan can ALL go away.
P.S. You have to sign in to vote now? Wow...
That's a thing Disqus did on its own; it's totally our of our hands. You need to sign in to down vote now, yes.
I like Chuckistans better lmao oh yeah I was a chuckistan lmao
and I do agree, they need to calm their tits, I don't understand why hair boy is mother theresa. he's one of the biggest hypocrites of this show next to trollesa, you'll see he'd be GG even though it will not make any sense like the rest of this trainwreck
I liked the episode. Though I'm still trying to get myself back to liking Blair, season 5 messed her over for me. She just comes off whiny to me a lot, especially when she talks about Dan o.O And when I 1st started this show, I hated Blair/loved Serena/loved Dan throughout the seasons this has changed where I love Blair too but then season 5 hit and I disliked her & I started to dislike Dan - and not just because of Dair. But season 6 has caused me to start liking Dan again, I like him in his rise to be respected by the UES & NJBC.
That music at the Bart/Chuck scene though slayed me lol.
I liked the episode until the final scene. Please god, have it be a dream sequence. Oh, who am I kidding? It's not. But I really want to know what the writer's were thinking there...it was soooo campy.
And I really wish Chuck & Blair had tried to help Bart. I get that Bart just tried to kill Chuck twice, but isn't Chuck supposed to be a better man? Just make it so they got to the edge too late or whatnot. I was just waiting for a tiny step, a lean towards Bart, ANYTHING, cause Bart was hanging on the ledge awhile!
Bart's final words, "This isn't you," are going to haunt Chuck for the rest of his life! Or they should. That makes me sad.
If Dan is GG, I totally want to read that list on how it doesn't make sense. I still won't mind, but, it'll be like the ending of LOST. We can complain about the unanswered nonsense forever!
1. I LOLed so hard at that entire scene, I am pretty sure I creeped out my neighbours...GG has always been good at comedic and dramatic scenes - but this was such a parody on oh I don't know any bad cheesy horror movie you have ever seen that you could not help but laugh and ask yourself for the 7865323345th time why are you still watching this?
2. I was tooo distracted by her fugly outfits and terrible make-up to care.
3. No, ugh no. Carter was and still remains the only guy for Serena. He accepted her no matter how many times she DERPS.
4. Blair's Bitches - ok, Ivy is a pro con artist, G is a manipulating psycho bitch, Serena is useful, but Sage - sorry but Jenny had to work her way to earn a spot with Blair - Sage is lame.
5. While treating me to some scenes from s1 and s2 (haha, does the show also realize how awesome it was back then?), you don't walk into the same river twice as they say in my country, so it didn't matter, the show made the last 9 episodes terrible - Blair's Audrey Hepburn dream sequences would be good if Leghton Meester wasn't so terrible in them, Derena's elevator scene would be good if Dan hadn't made that happen to research Serena, headbands would have been great if Blair still knew HOW to wear them.
6. C
7. Dan or Dan knows who GG is.
A for Awful! are you insane? worst episode of the worst season! The fighting was ridiculous and watching his own dad die it's ok? even if bart wanted him die (since when bart is that evil with chuck?) chuck could show is not like his father and give them to the authorities mainly after his speech (what a joke)
chuck bass from an attempt rapist to a murderer and then dan is the worst? are you kidding me? because dan was semi evil for 9 episodes?
shame on you and the writers to reach chuck as hero