Hostages series premiere review: It’s what you expect

Just a quick review… Beware of spoilers!

I did something crazy and senior-y tonight, everyone. I watched CBS from 8 p.m. to 11 p.m. That’s right, I watched it all: the one-hour How I Met Your Mother premiere, 2 Broke Girls, Mom, and the new supposedly miniseries thriller Hostages. (So if no one writes about the other series by tomorrow, I’ll step in with my thoughts.) And, you know what? Hostages ain’t half bad.

But it’s exactly what you expect. A conspiracy to kill the president? Check. Pregnant teen daughter? Check. Son who’s in bad company? You bet! Adultery taking place in front of open windows? Yep. It’s all there. Every thriller checkbox is filled. But that doesn’t necessarily make it bad.

Even though I went through the motions, there’s a weird addictive quality to Hostages that will make me come back for episode two. When Ellen gave that little look at the end of the episode into the camera and then it cut to the credits, I weirdly found myself wanting more. I hope to whatever higher being that they don’t expand the miniseries into a full-blown series like most networks like to do these days, as I can see myself spending another fourteen hours with this safe thriller — but not much more than that. And even then, I don’t even understand how they could keep up this hostage situation for that many episodes. Once this family escapes or dies, what else is there?

Who knows, maybe I’ll think next week is too much of a retread. There were already moments like the one where Dylan McDermott hides the teenage daughter’s pregnancy that make me just go ugh, you know? That’s sort of the problem when the concept of your series is really the only thing the series is about. This is a show titled Hostages that’s about hostages. There’s not a more binding thread to the audience here than that. But perhaps they’ll surprise us.