Okay, if you guys have been reading my reviews for some time: you know how much love I have for this show. I saw tweets linking to my last review asking if that person and I were watching the same show. Believe me, we are. It’s just that these past few episode have not been jiving well with me. (Then again they were probably a Damon and Elena fan and I made it clear that I still believe in Stefan and Elena.) Anyway, on to the review…

Either I’ve been delusional these past two and a half seasons and I’m just beginning to realize it or it’s actually happening now, but it appears that The Vampire Diaries will stop at nothing to just give people love interests. When Elena and Bonnie go meet her mom, they’re greeted by that actor that looks like Cuba Gooding Jr’s brother that used to be on One on One, on the same network that Girlfriends used to be on which was somewhat a funny coincidence, and Elena makes googly eyes at him. And then when they find out he’s not Bonnie’s relative, she makes suggestive googly eyes at Bonnie, like “Oh, hook up with him, gurl!”

What? Are you kidding me? What is happening here? Does Elena not realize that Bonnie’s about to reunite with her mother for the first time — ever!? Does she not realize that the reason they’re there is to understand why a coffin is shut tight and contains vampires? What is wrong with her? And what is wrong with this show? I guess my cap from last week wasn’t that off.

Bonnie doesn’t need a love interest. Are you… she broke up with Jeremy like 2 weeks ago (in show time). What are you doing? Goodness. Please, show, just stick to the story here. Your strong suit is going full force with a moving plot. Perhaps it’s because this is the slowest the show has ever moved, this coffin story, that’s gotten my underwear in a bunch. I hope I just read Elena’s faces incorrectly.

Well, as you know, it’s no secret that I haven’t been a fan of this second half of the season. But thankfully, that was just a short blip in the episode. And I quite enjoyed the other romantic interests problems.

For example, Stefan and Elena’s scene was heartbreaking — and it proves my point from last week, that Stefan isn’t just going around being reckless and acting crazy. He didn’t even do anything to Jamie, really, once Elena was all “Do you even know how bad you’ve gotten ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!” Just, Elena… god. Anyway, besides who cares about Jamie at this point? I love how the show was being all dramatic when the woman who abandoned Bonnie, that we’ve never seen, was panicking about a guy, who we just met and don’t give a shit about, might die. And Bonnie’s mom’s reason for leaving is that she wanted to live as a woman, not a witch… after her powers were already gone…? I don’t.

I was happy, however, when Dr. Fell vervain’d Damon and siphoned his blood. Finally someone’s finding out about that secret. Imagine what could happen if it went mainstream. But then… Alaric just willfully offered up every secret ever. Um. Dr. Fell wasn’t exactly cleared of being a psycho killer. As far as I’m concerned, that theory is still on the table. You don’t… just… tell her about the magic ring! What? She asked if you were alive because of the vampire blood, your answer should have just been “yes.” You’re thinking with the wrong head.

I don’t really read that many other reviews of the show, so I don’t know if anyone else has really been affected by this second half of the season as I have been… but, well, I know that people can be quite forgiving of this show because it’s usually just so amazing. Perhaps I’ve just been crabby since the new year. Or perhaps I’m not watching the same show.

But there was at least one highlight: Caroline, her dad, and Tyler. How ridiculously… normal was that? Her dad was just protecting her from her high school boyfriend. I mean, he’s a werewolf-vampire hybrid who asked for help from his siring of a bloodthirsty villain… but still! When he was in the hospital telling Tyler he won’t let him see Caroline unless he breaks the siring, it was just so… funny, but in a good way. (I mean, I guess you can make the argument that we’ve seen Tyler change an innumerable amount of times with people watching him going “Ack! Tyler! Noooooo!!!! TYLER!!!!” but whatever.)

But nothing made me happier than when Elijah ripped the heart out of that hybrid. Thank goodness. The plot can go somewhere now.

OH AND YOU GUYS. ELENA HAD A PLAN… AND IT WORKED. Did you notice that? I mean, it was like a mini-plan, but she’s working on it. Pretty soon she’ll be making big plans! And they’ll pan out. How insane is that? Obviously this is the most shocking part of the episode.

What did you think of the episode? Am I just not watching the same show as you? Did you realize I didn’t mention Klaus nor hardly mentioned Damon at all in this review? Sound off!