My feelings about OUaT have not been very consistent. When the show first started out back in October, I was probably its biggest enthusiast promoting it on Twitter and Facebook and reading every single article about it. (I even recapped a couple of episodes right here.)  And then at around episode 8 or 9, I started hate watching the show and not enjoying it all – it became, well, boring and.. tacky.  But during the last few episodes – mainly from episode 15 on – something happened. The show resurrected. Every episode was EPIC. The reveals were kinda awesome. They were all jaw-dropping and extremely satisfying.

And now that I realize that tomorrow’s the season finale, my heart is aching. I really don’t want the season to end. I want more fairy tales. I want to meet more characters. But at the same time, I just want Emma to believe already. Someone pointed out on Twitter that this storyline parallels that of Lost when Jack didn’t want to believe that the island was more than just an island. But just like Jack, deep inside, Emma believes. You know she does. She borrowed the book from Henry after her encounter with the Mad Hatter (more on that later) because a part of her wanted to discover her past. She broke down when August told her that it was her responsibility to save the residents of Storybrooke not because she didn’t believe but because it was all too much for her to handle.

In last week’s episode, Henry ate Regina’s apple pie to prove to Emma that the curse is real. If he’s poisoned, then Regina is the evil queen trying to put her to sleep the way she did to Snow White. But knowing Emma, she’s going to cook up some excuse as not to believe. She’s going to try rationalize it so that she wouldn’t have to believe that the curse actually exists. She needs to be pushed  but not by August – by her parents: Mary Margaret and David.

When Jefferson told her he was the Mad Hatter, she told him she wanted nothing more than to believe that her mother was Mary Margaret. But then she beat the guy thinking he’s a psycho. Somewhere deep inside her heart, Emma believed herself. Somewhere deep inside her heart, Emma knows that her parents are right there with her.

In one of the sneak peeks, we see Mary Margaret reading the fairy tale book to Henry. And she’s reading it, you can see her heart breaking and her eyes tearing. But is it because she feels guilty that she gave him the book in the first place? Or is it because she’s remembering who she was while reading the book. Will Mary Margaret and David be the ones leading Emma to FINALLY give in to the idea of another existing?

Another thought that is driving me crazy: if good triumphs evil in tomorrow’s “A Land Without Magic,” what the hell will happen to Regina, the evil Queen. If the show wants to play it out happy ending-style, the queen would die. But this isn’t a series finale (thank God), it’s a season finale meaning it’s going to end with a cliffhanger that will split our brains for four months until the show comes back in the fall.

The question  of what’s next is just ringing in my ear every time I think about the show: If Emma in fact believes, if Emma in fact reverses the curse, what will happen? Where would Storybrooke go? Will Emma become a part of the fairy tale, and will time start passing? Will her parents start actually looking like her parents?

I have a lot of questions about tomorrow that are just killing me. But I know that Kitsis and Horowitz will play the season finale out beautifully. Why? Because this show is SO good with reveals – the show is so good with cliffhangers and twist that will drive anyone mad. My favorite episodes of the season so far have been those that have made my head spin. I mean, Red Riding Hood turning out to be the Big Bad Wolf? How amazing was that? They took me on a roller coaster through that episode that left me extremely satisfied – surprisingly. If you had told me that they were going to make Red Riding Hood a wolf? I would have objected. But as I was watching, I enjoyed it. Another warped storyline I enjoyed was Rumpelstiltskin being Belle’s Beast. They have been messing with the traditional Grimm fairy tales, but they’re doing it perfectly, so you won’t see me complaining anytime soon.

Another episode I loved? “Hat Trick” guest-starring Sebastian Stan as the Mad Hatter. I was filled with adrenaline while watching that episode. His Storybrooke self, Jefferson, kidnapped both Emma & Mary Margaret only to reveal that he’s doing that so Emma can help him get his daughter back. He knew she was the savior. She’s the only one that could have helped him make his hat work. He remembered his fairy tale self and he tried helplessly to convince Emma, but with no use. Even though the CGI, honestly, sucks on this show, Wonderland was amazing. It was truly the Wonderland that I’d envisioned in my mind. I enjoyed the episode for another reason: the chemistry between Jefferson & Emma. OMG. I just wanted them to kiss! Sebastian Stan kicked ass as the Mad Hatter. They better bring him back in season 2.

Now, let’s talk about August. When he first came around, I didn’t like him. I thought he was cute, definitely. But I did not like him. I didn’t trust him. I thought he was working with the Queen. And then we found out he was Pinocchio, and I couldn’t love him more. It was his duty to stay alongside Emma to try to guide to save everyone. But he was selfish, and he walked away from his responsibility.  And now it’s on him.

What do you think would have happened if August had stayed with Emma in their foster home? What if she had grown up knowing that Snow White was her mother? Would have been a part of Storybrooke sooner? Would she have told her parents what she knew? Would she have had Henry? I like to think that sometime during the course of this show the writers will take us to an alternate reality where we would see that. I hope so, at least.

By the way, does the fact that Emma & August used to be in one foster home mean that they can’t be together? Because the sexual tension between them is undeniable. And when Emma is gonna break down in tomorrow’s episode, I have a feeling August will be the person Emma will run to for refuge.

You didn’t think I would write a piece about OUaT and not talk about the most adorable couple on TV, did you? Yes, Snow White & Prince Charming. And no, not Mary Margaret and David. They’re not the same couple – to me, at least. Snow & Charming were noble. They risked their lives to save others but always found each other. Mary Margaret & David’s relationship lacked all the innocence that made their fairytale relationship so beautiful. David cheated on his wife to be with Mary Margaret. He humiliated both women while doing so. James would have never done that. I hope MM & David find their fairytale selves tomorrow. I hope they can have what they had 28 years earlier.

I don’t think I can wait any longer for the season finale tomorrow night. I have so many expectations. I have so many hopes. I have so many theories. I just hope my bubble doesn’t get burst while watching it. It has to be epic. It needs to be epic because a season as amazing as this one needs a legendary closure.

Are you excited about Once Upon a Time’s season finale? Any theories you’d like to share?